Christian pre-marital counselling, so you can begin your marriage well
Pre-marital counselling with Help Ariseth is a calm, faith-based space to talk honestly about the things that matter before you say "I do", so you can begin your marriage with clarity, trust and peace.
- 10 to 12 preparation sessions
- 8 key areas of marriage
- A Christian approach
Ready to begin?
Each of you signs the agreement below, then you complete the inventory before your first session.
- Online, on Zoom
- Guided by Funmilola Sonubi
- Confidential
Marriage is an adventure worth preparing for
Every adventure brings surprises and challenges. The couples who move through them well are rarely the ones who never struggle. They are the ones who took time to understand each other before the journey began.
Christian pre-marital counselling gives you that time. Please read this page carefully. It explains what to expect, what we ask of you, and the areas we will explore together.
The questions we ask are never meant to embarrass you. They are here to help you start well.
Some things to bear in mind
These are the commitments and conversations that help you get the most from your preparation.
Attend your sessions
We recommend a minimum of 10 to 12 pre-marital counselling sessions.
Stay connected to church
We recommend that you do not miss church services during your preparation.
Complete your homework
Some sessions include reflection work to complete between meetings. We recommend you complete all of it.
A season of waiting
If you are already traditionally married or have had a registry wedding, and you are living together or sleeping together, we ask that you stop during your preparation.
Pregnancy
Please let us know if you are already pregnant, so we can support you both well.
Health conversations
Have you talked openly with each other about genotype, sexually transmitted infections and HIV? These conversations belong before marriage.
Immigration
If one partner is not a UK or European citizen, you may need to speak with an immigration solicitor or a regulated immigration adviser.
Honest disclosure
Before marriage, share with your partner any known abnormalities, sickness or diseases. Important health knowledge should never be kept a secret.
Honesty is where it starts. To fully benefit from pre-marital counselling, you will both need to be honest, first with yourself, and then with your partner.
What we explore in pre-marital counselling
Across your sessions, we will walk through eight areas of married life at a pace that feels safe for you both.
Your story
How you met, how long you have known each other, and how you came to the decision to marry.
Faith
Your journeys of faith, and your beliefs around worship, serving in church, tithes and offerings, and missions.
Marriage as God intended
The sanctity, permanence and exclusivity of marriage, biblical headship and submission, partnership, and love as described in 1 Corinthians 13.
Family background
The homes you grew up in, the patterns you carry, and what you each expect from marriage.
Roles in marriage
Who does what in your home and why, from cooking to caring for children when they arrive.
Finances
Debt, budgeting, how you will manage accounts and bills, property, and your first project together.
Intimacy and children
Intimacy as God's gift within marriage, your hopes for children, how you will raise them, and adoption.
Deliverance and a fresh start
Breaking ties with past relationships, letting go of old keepsakes, and renouncing promises made to former partners.
Your path through pre-marital counselling
Read this page together
Take your time with the commitments and the eight areas, and talk about anything that stands out.
Each sign the agreement
Each partner completes the agreement below separately, using their own name and email address.
Complete the inventory
Each of you fills in the Marriage Preparation Inventory on your own, then you talk it through together.
Begin your sessions
Meet with Funmilola for 10 to 12 sessions, exploring each area at a pace that feels safe for you both.
Questions couples often ask
How many pre-marital counselling sessions will we need?
We recommend a minimum of 10 to 12 sessions, so there is time to explore all eight areas properly.
Do we both need to sign the agreement?
Yes. Each partner completes the agreement separately, using their own name and email address. You will each receive a confirmation by email.
Are the sessions online?
Sessions take place online on Zoom. In-person sessions in Rainham are available by arrangement.
What if something is hard to talk about in front of my partner?
You are welcome to get in touch privately before you begin. The questions are never meant to embarrass you. They are here to help you both start well.
Confirm you have read and understood
Each partner should complete this form separately, using their own name and email address. A confirmation will be sent to your email.
Thank you. Your agreement has been received.
A confirmation will arrive in your inbox shortly. Please check your spam folder if you do not see it. Your next steps are below.
Your next steps
Check your email
Once you submit the agreement, a confirmation copy will arrive in your inbox. Please keep it for your records.
Complete your inventory
Each of you will fill in the Marriage Preparation Inventory on your own. Please do not discuss your answers until you have both finished.
Open the inventoryTalk it through, then meet
After you have both completed the inventory, talk it through together before your first session. We will explore it gently from there.
Questions about pre-marital counselling?
If anything on this page feels unclear, or there is something you would prefer to discuss privately, you are welcome to get in touch. You do not have to work it out alone.
Already married? See couples counselling or family counselling.
